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David1
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Posts: 142
Thoughts on Tron 2.1 Fanfic direction and content

on Thursday, November, 22, 2007 6:34 AM
Hi All,

### Warning - Spoilers in this section ###

Just thought I'd open a new thread to discuss the Tron 2.1 fanfic I was serialising.

It now past 45,000 word and 100 pages.

Anyway, since it's getting a little longer, I wanted to get some opinions on the story direction and characters.

Since any discussion like this is going to be full of spoilers, I didn't want it in the same thread as the one I'm using to announce new chapters and talk about current occurances.

I know there's not a huge readership at present, but I know there are about a half-dozen regular readers who contribute feedback, which I do read.

Most of that I use to fine-tune the way I write subsequent chapters, so many of the early criticisms were expected and actually helped me keep the story on track.

As at now, there are 9 chapters, each averaging around 5000 words. The most of the main characters have been defined, both inside and outside of the digital world.

The first question I was hoping the regular readers would help me with was about Jade.

I'll detail some quick notes about Jade here. Anything that isn't already obvious isn't intended to be a spoiler. I'll hold back on some things as there is a little more to know in 2.19 about her.

Character: Jade
Program Sex - Female
Age Appearance - Indeterminate. Could pass as anything around 30ish.
Age: Very old. Remembers the MCP. At least 20 human years. Thousand of subjective program years.
Function: System Application - Syslog.
Run-level 2. (Root). (Kernel or MCP would be 1, Sark would be 2 also, for comparison).

Other than that, what I will say presently about the intended character is that she's pretty wily. She's been around longer than even the Kernel and remembers first-hand the era of Tron and Flynn. (She's likely to be the only character other than Flynn or Alan who goes back this far, other than I-no. And Yes, She would know I-No quite well and vice-versa, but that's not a plot mechanism for this story.).

(She was around when Flynn entered the first time, but was a very new application around then - later adapted to serve the Kernel.).

She's pretty tough, literally vicious and very dangerous (far more so that is immediately obvious ). She's a survivor and knows how to manipulate programs to get what she wants. Ma3a is right to be cautious of her.

On the other hand, she does seem completely attached to Jet. The "Watch" beacon isn't just an API. It's more like a SUDO permission - ie, root level access to her routines. Her pledge is genuine too - Jet effectively now "owns" her. But her reasons for doing this aren't completely known and it's not something a program would do lightly - ever.

Other than that, she does seem to fight on the side of the users.

The reasons for adding Jade?

There are many, most of which are yet to develop, so I'll add them in later, but at a purely superficial level, she's a system routine, which means she can do stuff the others can't.

She also needed to explain some things to Jet and intercede at times. Kind of a Deus Ex Machina for 2.18.

Anyway, I was wondering what are the reader feelings for this character at present?

Thanks
David1





 
aldul
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Posts: 194
Re: Thoughts on Tron 2.1 Fanfic direction and cont

on Thursday, November, 22, 2007 6:29 PM
Jade's a terrific character. I was worried a bit that she might not survive the trip to the dais (Asymmetric Path), but it sounds like she has a long way to go.

The strong female characters are refreshing (Ma3a, Jade, Mercury) as well as the strong male characters (Jet, Flynn, Kernel.) It make for great reading to to see all these strong wills conflict and cooperate with each other.

I also appreciate the accurate technical aspects (correct usage of sudo). You must know what you're doing. I'm an engineer at Apple, and Tron is a reason why I'm here. Any good continuation of the story really rings with me.

Thanks much.


 
Jademz
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Posts: 0
Re: Thoughts on Tron 2.1 Fanfic direction and content

on Thursday, November, 22, 2007 7:41 PM
I like the character, the storyline with Ma3a determining Jade as an error seemed subtle, and now I worry, lol.


 
David1
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Posts: 142
Re: Thoughts on Tron 2.1 Fanfic direction and content

on Thursday, December, 06, 2007 6:06 AM
OK, Now 2.20 is up, some of the detail in the characters if the story is coming out.

Mercury's not appearing as tough as she was in 2.0, at least around Jet. Ma3a is starting to act a little like a concerned parent, Jade should appear slightly neurotic and the Kernel seems to have an undefined relationship with her.

The Kernel should appear to be pretty undfeatable and also know something about what's going on that even Mercury and Jet aren't aware of and now it's released that three sectors are unexpectedly offline with only one explained.

I'd be interested on how the character personalities are coming across at present -

Thanks,
David1


 
Jademz
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Posts: 0
Re: Thoughts on Tron 2.1 Fanfic direction and cont

on Sunday, December, 23, 2007 12:57 PM
I think the direction for the characters is starting to look less technical. The piece where ma3a is standing by, as Jade brought redundancy to her User during the last few chapters, seems to hurt the dynamics of the character(s).

I know having them together in writing is more difficult, so it works. But the characters have been somewhat disconnected, then don't seem to have a word between them, other than thier programming.

That may be all the less active characters need, in the mean time, rather than being divisive.where to buy abortion pill http://blog.bitimpulse.com/template/default.aspx?abortion-types buy abortion pill online


 
David1
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Posts: 142
Re: Thoughts on Tron 2.1 Fanfic direction and content

on Friday, December, 28, 2007 5:35 PM
Jademz Wrote:I think the direction for the characters is starting to look less technical. The piece where ma3a is standing by, as Jade brought redundancy to her User during the last few chapters, seems to hurt the dynamics of the character(s).

I know having them together in writing is more difficult, so it works. But the characters have been somewhat disconnected, then don't seem to have a word between them, other than thier programming.

That may be all the less active characters need, in the mean time, rather than being divisive.

Interesting comment - yes, the story so far has neglected Ma3a, which is something I need to consider while writing future chapters. So far, she's about as attached to this story as she was in Tron 2.0 - ie, not a lot.

While she's not once of the core plot characters yet (her time is yet to come), she's still important, so I'll keep that feedback in mind as I write.

Jet's time with Mercury has yet to come also, although they had some brief time shortly after they found each other again, yet were pre-occupied with Jet's other mission at the time.

That mission is coming to a close with Chapter 14, which will bring Jet in line with the bigger mission of surviving with the impending failure of the EN511 although that plot thread is already apparent in previous chapters if you've been read between the lines.

Jade's character is evolving more now that Jet is accepting her as a friend while starting to realise what her motivations were in coming along in the first place.

Anyway, please keep providing feedback. Knowing how the chapters read while still putting them together is important - especially now that the story is well progressed.

David1


 
David1
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Posts: 142
Re: Thoughts on Tron 2.1 Fanfic direction and content

on Saturday, January, 05, 2008 8:18 PM
OK, well now the reasons for the digital world existing and an understanding of it's tenuous connection to the real world is starting to come forward in Jet's mind.

Also, things aren't going so well in the real world and the others have all been captured, and it seems that the military is getting involved.

The extent of Jet's user powers is starting to become apparent and he's already made a few digital faux pas.

The Datawraiths seem to be pulling out for reasons not yet clear and they seem to have other, undefined objectives that haven't been made clear yet.

Jet's secret is out - it's obvious now to those around him that he's a user ( Even though the Kernel could subsume the IC Regular ICPs, it can't subsume the conscripts amongst them )

And Mercury, and Ma3a still don't trust Jade.

Alchemist seems to be happier with the idea of killing Jet than working for him and something's not quite right with Melanie.

And even though Jet has located Melanie, he still can't get her back to the real world, because the power is out to the digitising lab and it's running on emergency power that is looking shakier by the minute.


So what's the real problem?

My chapters are getting larger containing all of the above.

So the question I wouldn't mind help with is does the story still flow well enough as they blow out in size?

All other criticisms and comments welcome too, of course.

David1where to buy abortion pill http://blog.bitimpulse.com/template/default.aspx?abortion-types buy abortion pill online


 
aldul
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Posts: 194
Re: Thoughts on Tron 2.1 Fanfic direction and cont

on Monday, January, 07, 2008 5:38 PM
Absolutely. You've set up a number of plot threads, so I'd expect a lot to be going on to keep everything going. It's great that you're keeping it all organized and moving forward.

I think by now I'm biased, as I like this story the best out of anything in the TRON world. The original movie introduced a new idea and had revolutionary visuals. The game updated the look rather satisfactorily and let me look around and play in the world, while advancing the story. This continuation packs so much material it's like getting whacked in the head with a pillowcase full of arcade tokens, in a good way.

I've read far far worse stuff that's been published. This has a place on the bookshelves.


 
David1
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Posts: 142
Re: Thoughts on Tron 2.1 Fanfic direction and content

on Wednesday, January, 09, 2008 5:42 PM
Thanks for the comments Aldul,

It's comments like that that keep the chapters flowing

We're just past the halfway mark at the moment (estimate based on how much story is left to tell, not on actual words/chapters).

Well, the last chapter was a little bit different from the others, so I hope no one was offended by either the content or the role the characters played.

While in real terms the characters did very little more than you'd see on public transport at times, in spiritual terms, it went a lot further and I'm hoping the spiritual side showed through in the writing. (Consider the implications of characters being able to re-experience the emotions and feelings of another).

Without putting too much of a spoiler in here, there's only so much I can say, but I will confirm that the content is a part of the story and it's not intended to be gratuitous in any way.

David1



 
aldul
User

Posts: 194
Re: Thoughts on Tron 2.1 Fanfic direction and cont

on Wednesday, January, 09, 2008 6:56 PM
The chapter read great. You could have simply wrote "A few subjective hours later, the transport arrived in Sector 2, and everyone disembarked." Very boring.

You chose to use this "down time" in the story to add layers of information to the story. The encounter between Jet and Mercury and Jet's dream (previously) all add lots of detail and make the story much richer.

In contrast, my wife is reading a book written by Freud's granddaughter because that alone made it interesting. Unfortunately, the story itself seems a bit plodding, along the lines of "The character was riding on a train. She was hungry, but there was no dining car, so she stared out the window." That's it, very linear. It doesn't discuss her thoughts while walking around on the train, thinking about a great meal she had in the past, or what her thoughts actually were while staring out the window.

Again, in contrast to that, she read another book that was fairly short for a novel, but had so many threads running through it, it made for a highly satisfying read.

My opinion is that you've taken the latter approach here, layering up the story, giving lots of backstory and laid out what's happening inside the characters' minds.

Anyway, it's worth repeating. Great job!


 
David1
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Posts: 142
Re: Thoughts on Tron 2.1 Fanfic direction and content

on Saturday, February, 09, 2008 3:41 AM
New content. Hmmm, Sometimes I wonder if too much is happening in the digital world... Now something bad has happened to Ma3a...

Anyway, I'd be really interested in hearing from readers about this development... It's a side-story woven into the main to give Ma3a some more story time, which several readers have alluded they would like.

Of course, it may not be what everyone expected...

Any opinions?

David


 
Jademz
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Posts: 0
Re: Thoughts on Tron 2.1 Fanfic direction and cont

on Saturday, February, 09, 2008 4:09 PM
David1 Wrote:It's a side-story woven into the main to give Ma3a some more story time, which several readers have alluded they would like.
David

You just write this story so well!

who else would describe in such detail, a coherent 7 layer quantum electrodynamic multistate innerspace probabilistic domain inside a computer, with video gamers themselves being the hero? -that is, other than maybe Steven Lisberger.



I'll have to finish this post in a bit...



 
Jademz
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Posts: 0
Re: Thoughts on Tron 2.1 Fanfic direction and cont

on Saturday, February, 09, 2008 5:31 PM
ok, back to the plot. If -Ma3a was Jet's mother, and was reconstituted into the woman, possibly by using the combination of alchemist's programming and the f-con compression/extraction technology compounded, to form the technology that now belongs to Jet, giving the upper hand to him, well.. it's just a thought.


 
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